 When the going gets tough, the tough
call on Jade Morrow, the heroine of my latest Blaze, "Working
It." There are times in your life when somebody's going
to give you a hard time. Jade thrives on hard times... and
hard cases. So the next time you're feeling put upon, trampled
on, and generally "happiness challenged", here
are some tips on getting your game on -- Jade Morrow style!
1. Dress
the part. It might seem ridiculous,
but when you know you've got a tough talk or confrontational
situation coming up, dress up for it. When Jade first meets
Drew, she dresses up in a sexy black suit with a mini and
high heels -- not because she wants to try to use sex to
influence him, but because she knows what looks good on her,
and when she looks good, she feels good. The key here: figure
out what makes you feel confident. Not necessarily comfortable
-- you don't want to throw on sweats to talk about a promotion,
obviously -- but something that changes your attitude. Think
of it as a ritual -- pre-game, as it were.
2. Know
what you're getting into. Jade
thinks she knows exactly what she's walking into when she
first confronts Drew -- and then finds out later she was
missing some information that put her in a bad spot. Her
next meeting is more prepared. She knows what his arguments
are going to be, and she's got her arguments set up around
it. If you're going to be walking into an adversarial situation,
either with a co-worker, fellow committee member, even with
your kids, first look at it from their point of view. It
helps with communication -- and it will help get your point
across.
3. Know
what you want to get out of it. One of the reasons Jade is a "closer" is because
she always has her goal firmly in mind. She's like a guided
missile. She knows what she wants, and doesn't get distracted
or let her temper get the best of her when she's ogled or
patronized by male clients. Sometimes it's hard, especially
when the person you're dealing with has a history of pushing
your buttons. But Jade knows that the end result is worth
a lot more than the instant gratification of shutting down
an idiot. Keep the end result in mind.
4. Keep
a sense of humor. Jade gets rattled
and frustrated, but for the most part, she's able to laugh
about her life. Look at the situation. Is it really worth
making yourself insane when odds are good the other person
involved isn't going to care or even remember your conversation? "Have
a laugh, not a heart attack" is Jade's personal motto.
5. Take
time outs. Jade's best thinking
time is driving her Mustang up the California coast. Considering
her workload, she knows she needs down time. Before you get
your game on, make sure that you're taking time out, getting
perspective, and recharging your batteries. If you don't,
you'll walk into your next tough meeting leading with your
chin.
6. Connect
with your best friend. Jade's
the picture of confidence, but even gets kicked around. Fortunately,
she knows that she's got her best friend, Hailey, to lean
on when things get brutal. Nobody can do it alone. Have your
circle of friends on speed-dial... just in case.
7. Figure
out your passion. Jade's got
passion in spades. She doesn't do anything unless she can
go for it one-hundred percent, whether it's succeeding in
her job or falling in love. Think about what's bringing you
down. Is it because you're doing something you hate? How
can you fix that -- or move to something that you can really
feel great about?
8. Go
for it. Jade made her reputation
by succeeding in areas where people had failed, partially
because of skill, but mostly because she was willing to try.
She has an almost fearless personality because she wants
to get the end result so badly. How badly do you want your
dreams? What are you willing to do to get them?
9. Develop
an attitude. Jade's got a personal
style all her own, a combination of confidence, sexiness,
humor and professional skill. She's never ignored and rarely
defeated. She loves being Jade, as it were. This is an important
attitude to cultivate. What do you do well? How would you
describe yourself? Who do you want to be?
10. Win
or lose -- it's only a game. Jade
knows when to draw the line. Her goal of getting promoted
is seriously challenged by the unexpected: falling in love
with her client! But she also figures out what's really important
in her life. Little setbacks or big dramas, keep the faith
-- you're going to be fine at the end of the day.
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